To Live the Life Authentic

"I will live authentically, accepting blame for my mistakes as well as praise for my triumphs. Judge me if you will, but judge me for my dedication to living my own truth." - SK Waller

Many years ago I had a dream in which I found myself in a room whose walls were lined with beautiful porcelain, hand-painted drainpipes that looked like they were made by Dresden. There were other facets to the dream that I won't go into here, but I always wondered what the drainpipes represented in the context of the dream. I knew that they symbolized channels and that their being so white and beautiful with little flowers and cherubs painted on them, symbolized the need to keep my channels pure and free of debris. Still, I had no idea how to apply that to the specifics of the dream. I finally figured it out this past weekend. It has taken me nearly 25 years to do so.

I now realize that each drainpipe is a negativity that I harbor in my deepest recesses, those things that, like playing with a bad tooth, "hurt so good" and which I cannot leave alone. As these little epiphanies come to me, I'm writing them down so that I can name each drainpipe and clean the years of debris that has collected in it. This is the only way that I can be a clean channel, so to speak, to live a life of prosperity and joy without regret and without feeling unworthy.

The truth about judgmentalism is that it tells us more about the judge than it does the judged. How can I allow the shallow biases of people I hardly know destroy my happiness? Who are they anyway, and why should I care what they think or say about me? We should only listen to the words of people who care about us, because we will then attempt to live up to their good opinions. If we listen to people who don't care about us we fall further into the abyss of self-loathing and feelings of inadequacy.

I know that I have a great many issues that need to be dealt with, because there were a lot of drainpipes in that dream, but another part of it depicted great abundance, as well as joy and laughter without end.