I finally realized tonight why I like watching Lifetime movies: they're sterling examples of really bad screenwriting. Sure, every now and then a good one will sneak in there, like See You in My Dreams, starring Marcia Gay Hardin and Aiden Quinn, but mostly, they're pieces o' crap with predictable plots and endings (see this entry). The worst part is, they're not even bad enough to become cult films. They're banal, and that's unforgivable.
This weekend, LMN (Lifetime Movie Network) broadcast something they called, "Into The Light", meaning the movies would be of a paranormal nature in honor of Halloween. Instead, they were the same old hack films that show women and children as victims. They call it "television for women", but the screenplays are really written for men, I suspect. I can deal with soft-slasher "porn", but seriously bad writing, plot points that lead nowhere, and subplots that are never resolved are another matter. I think watching these things should become part of every writing course offered to would-be authors, playwrights and screenwriters. They're really just dime store bodice-ripper paperbacks on film.
Watching these has become one of our favorite things to do on Sunday afternoons. Especially after a Saturday night party. They require zero concentration and cogitation, and one can nap through the first half and still pick up on the story in the last 30 minutes. Sometimes I'm tempted to write one, and then I realize that life's too short to write that kind of stuff, and too long to watch it.
Still, I do.