I just want to take a moment to offer my services to you. If you're planning an outdoor event—a party or a back yard BBQ—invite me. I don't eat much and all I ask for in payment is access to your beer cooler or kegerator. Why? Because I'm a mosquito magnet. None of my guests get bitten because the little buggers all flock to me. I wear repellent bracelets on all four limbs, I wear white, loose-fitting clothing, I use herbal repellents, I don't put drip trays beneath my plants and I surround the patio with a multitude of citronella candles and smoking mosquito lanterns. Still, they find me and feast away.It takes 24 hours for me to feel the full effect and to begin counting the bites. From last Friday night I have 6 on my right foot, 1 on my right ankle, 3 on my right leg, 4 on my right arm, 3 on my left foot, 2 on my left leg and 1 on my left arm. That's 20 bites. And due to my messed up, over-active immune system, they're as big as nickels and the itching is awful. Some are even bruised.
I love summer and I love my hammock, but I can't go out there at night anymore. I really don't want to get the West Nile Virus and something about coating my skin with insecticide completely turns me off.
